quiregrrl | (no subject)

Someone I love dearly is currently going through the painful ordeal of a family member in the terminal stages of lung cancer, and the suffering ripples through everyone connected.

I hate that this person I love has to watch someone they care about die, and I don't ever want to be the cause of that pain for anyone I care about if I can help it.

I need to quit smoking... not eventually, but now. No more excuses. I don't think I'd cope with cold turkey right away, but I have made a promise to quit completely by mid December.

I'm putting it here so that everyone can hold me accountable. I have now smoked for more than half of my life, I have spent tens of thousands of dollars on cigarettes, and I have failed at quitting more times than I can count. I will not fail this time, but I may need help... please don't offer me cigarettes if you're a smoker, please don't replace any of my cigarettes that you smoke, please hold my hand if you see me flailing in social situations, please remind me that I have a promise to keep if you see me lighting up, please forgive me if my withdrawals impact on you... i will do my best to not let that happen but I can't promise I will always be rational.

I have 10 weeks to cut down and quit smoking completely. I will do this.

ETA: I can't do patches (allergic to sticky things on my skin), I really don't believe I'd survive Champex, I will investigate nicotine gum as a means of relieving the withdrawal symptoms and making it a bit easier....